Woman in the Middle

A couple of weeks ago I was woken up in the middle of the night by the sound and feel of a THUMP on the pillow right next to my head. Surprise! I opened my eyes and saw Hubby’s hand hovering in the air above my face. I knew immediately what had hit my pillow. I reached up, gently grabbed his hand, and put it back where it belonged over on his side of the bed.

The next day I began to wonder…did I dream all that? After all, we have been married 27+ years and nothing like that has ever happened before. So I asked him when he got home….did I dream the thump? No, he told me, it really happened. He was dreaming that he was at a party in the back yard at his mom’s house. Family members were there, as well as Keith Richards and Ronnie Woods of the Rolling Stones. There was also a really ratty poodle who had gotten skunked. The poodle was trying to get into the house and he threw out a hand to block it…and that was when he thumped my pillow.

Poor guy, it woke him up immediately, too. He realized what had happened and was thinking how very unhappy I would have been if he had hit me in the head, which he very nearly did. As his hand still hovered in the air over my head he wondered if he had woken me up. Just then I reached up and moved his hand and he knew he had. Then we both rolled over and went back to sleep.

Good to know that even after all these years, I can still expect the unexpected!

Oh so many years ago, (although in some ways it seems like yesterday) the day after Hubby and I returned from our honeymoon we discovered that my mother had taken ill while we were gone. That began a difficult time of surgery, rehabilitation, and the complete switching of the mother/daughter roles. My Dad had passed away a few years before and I was the main one who had to deal with taking care of Mom, with me just married and all of 24 years old. Family friends expressed worry that the stress of this situation would ruin my brand new marriage. I just muttered to myself “I hope I picked better than THAT.”

Fast forward to last year when Hubby and I were planning to celebrate or 25th wedding anniversary. My brother had had major surgery at the beginning of April and had just gotten out of a month’s stay in the hospital and then skilled nursing when he called with the list of follow-up doctor’s appointments. His first visit to the oncologist was scheduled smack dab in the middle of the day on our anniversary, a day we were planning on taking off work and spending with each other.  Without thinking I made some mention of that to my brother and he immediately said he would change the appointment. I came to my senses at that point and told him no way, Hubby and I would be there at the appointed time to pick him up and go with him to that appointment. I certainly would not want to delay MY first appointment to see a cancer doctor and I wasn’t going to do that to Bro.

I felt a little bad, though, when I had to tell Hubby that our planned anniversary day out would now include a visit to the oncologist. However, he assured me it was no problem and we planned our day around the appointment.

On our anniversary we spent the morning in Pasadena, looking around at shops and perusing a bookstore. We had a nice leisurely lunch and then picked up Bro for his appointment. After the appointment we dropped him back off and then went to Huntington Beach where we walked on the pier and had dinner at a fun open air Mexican restaurant. It was one of the most perfect days of my entire life.

Marriage is all about going through all life brings together and our 25th anniversary epitomized that commitment. My Hubby’s gracious understanding concerning Bro’s appointment, being there together to support Bro, and still having day of doing some of our favorite things together made it a memorable day. Yep, I picked good.