Woman in the Middle

What is it about ice that makes it so forgettable? The fact that I forget it yesterday is all the ice’s fault, I am sure. It can’t be my fault….

I was having a meeting at my house last night. It happens to be the Alumnae Panhellenic group in my area. I went to the store in the afternoon. The main purpose of the trip was to get a bag of ice. It is warm here and I wanted to have plenty.  Ice is the sort of thing you want to pick up on the way out of the store. As a mater of fact the grocery store I frequent has a sign on the ice cooler asking patrons to get the ice last as it melts and drips all over the floor, creating a slipping hazard. I repeated over and over again “ice, ice” as I picked up a few other things. I ran into someone I know and we chatted a bit and as I rolled my cart away from her I said “ice, ice” to myself.

Yet, I managed to get out of the store without ice and didn’t even notice until I got home and was getting out of the car. Maybe if I had written “ICE” in permanent marker on the back of both hands I would have remembered it. Of course, that would have looked really classy at my meeting, but the ladies would have been assured of cold drinks.

Hubby came to the rescue and got a bag of ice for the event. Yet another reason why I married him. He goes and gets the ice when I forget it, yet again.

I am sitting in this week (and half of last week)  at a local weekly newspaper, covering the front desk, greeting people, answering the phones, and taking in legal notices and such, while the owners are away on vacation.  It is a small operation, just three people, so when two go on vacation a little help is needed to help everything get done. Yesterday was the long day as Tuesday is the day that the paper is finished and sent off to print. My job is not that difficult, it is just that there are a lot of little steps to make sure things are done correctly. I really want to do everything correctly, just because I am like that. So I have been suffering from brain drain, especially yesterday!

As I drove off from the office at 4 pm I felt a fog of tiredness descend upon my brain. It is not my body that is tired, just my brain. It is responding to being pushed and pushed to try to do something it hasn’t done before, the details of which are not yet firmly implanted in my mind. It has been a while since I have had that exhausted brain feeling. I am not impressed.

Today is another big day as I hold down the fort while the other person in the office is out handling paper distribution.  Here is hoping the fog does not descend as it did yesterday. Then I realized that it was 10:20 a.m. and I hadn’t posted yet. So now you know why! Back to my duties.

I believe in traveling light. My mantra is that I am working towards vacationing with a toothbrush and an extra pair of underwear. I probably will never meet that ideal, but I have managed to hammer my “travel light” mantra into my Hubby and daughters’ heads. For example, my girls know that we do not take things like hair straightening irons on vacation. Last year when we went to Hawaii every time we were picked up by the shuttle service to get to or from the airport the driver would look at the four or us, including two young women, and say, “Is this all your luggage?” When we answered “Yes” we often got a response like “wow!”  I considered that a success! I have to say that we are not “luxury” travelers. We do like our comforts but we don’t tend to do any thing on our trips that require really nice outfits, even “just in case.” So I rarely carry anything with me that doesn’t get worn on the trip. I know I have packed well if I put on the last clean pair of pants and shirt the last day of the trip. We also usually travel places that have stores. Worst case scenario I have to go shopping while on the trip. That is not a sad thing for me.  However, the only time I have had to do that was when the kids were younger. Somehow I didn’t count right when packing for  Eldest Daughter and I didn’t have enough shirts for her. A couple of cheap souvenir t-shirts fixed that problem!

I realize that not everyone want to travel as lightly as we do but I thought I would continue the travel theme of last Friday’s post about souvenirs and give you some of the helpful hints I have come up with over the years.

1. I have a drawer in my bathroom that is devoted to travel. It is filed with a variety of bags that can be used to hold bathroom type items and also has travel sizes of everything I might need. The length of the trip dictates the size of the bag and the number of items.

2. I never skimp on the number of over the counter medicines I take. I don’t want a trip to be sidelined because I didn’t bring cough medicine or something for diarrhea. I have learned this the hard way too many times to ever leave the house without at least the basics.

3. I save the clear cases with zippers that sheet sets all seem to come in now. I have discovered that women’s shoes will fit in them nicely, keeping the shoes corralled and my clothes clean. They could also be used for other packing needs such as for the aforementioned medicine, hair gadgets, etc. I keep every one that comes into my house!

4. I never take a heavy coat, I layer. A jacket of some sort of wind breaker type over a sweat jacket or sweatshirt usually keeps me warm and cozy. If is really cold them I add a long sleeve shirt, gloves and a scarf.

5. I always take at least one extra pair of shoes. Even shoes that have been comfortable old friends have been known to turn on me at the worst possible time. Happy feet are needed for a good vacation!

6. My hair is pretty wash and wear normally, but vacation is about seeing things and not being seen so I don’t worry if it isn’t perfect. This cuts down on the hair products and gizmos I might otherwise feel I need to take.

7. I no longer fold clothes, I roll them. I really didn’t think it would make a difference but it did. Rolling seems to free up space in the suitcase.

So, are you wondering how much luggage we took for a week in Hawaii? They were charging to check luggage so we took just one largish suitcase for Hubby’s clothes, and bigger than 3 ounce bottles of liquids, as well as some space for souvenirs. The girls and I all used small suitcases that could be carried on to the plane. Hubby had a carry on bag for reading material on the plane.   Yep, four people, four carry ons and one suitcase. And if you are wondering, no we did not do laundry while we were there.

When I was 16 I had the great good fortune to be sent on a 6 week trip with a teacher and a handful of fellow students to Europe and the mideast. You can only imagine the souvenirs I purchased and finally managed to get back home with me. I did manage to resist the urge to buy the 3 foot high camel in Egypt that looked like it was covered in cat fur. Many in my group did not resist that urge and in those heady days pre-9/11 the aisle of the plane was littered with those cat-camels.

Fast forward five years and to celebrate our graduation from college my friend Barbara and I went to England for two weeks. One of our must see places was Stoke-on-Trent where many of the English china factories have their seconds stores (or at least they did then.) Nothing says “Hard to get home” than a bunch of breakable china. Again, pre-9/11, Barbara and I staggered home with all kinds of goodies for our selves and our family.

I have to admit that I still have most of what I brought home from those two trips. But I also have tons of other stuff from a life time of accumulation as well as Hubby’s stuff and the kid’s stuff and stuff from my grandmother and my parents….So I don’t tend to bring home as many souvenirs as I used to. What made me think of all this is that I got a bowl full of hot veggies out of the microwave last night and I used my Hawaii potholder and my Australia pot holder. That is one of the things I buy now when I travel – a souvenir pot holder. It has a use and a place to go when I bring it home and when I use them it reminds me of a memorable vacation. The potholder habit started at, of all places, Graceland, former home of Elvis in Memphis, Tennessee.  They had a pot holder with one of Elvis’s favorite recipes on it and it made me laugh and I had to have it. Then there was the potholder with the Space Needle in Seattle on it and I was started on my new pot holder collection from around the world.

The other thing we always try to buy now is a small print of some sort, preferably purchased from a local artist, that will remind us of our trip. I now have a vacation wall where most of those vacation pictures are located. It is fun to see new people in my house try to guess where they are all from. The Sidney Opera House and the Space Needle are easy. No one ever can guess the cotton field in Arkansas with Memphis in the distance or the bridge in Newcastle-upon-Tyne, England.

We buy less now, but somehow it means more.

As I mentioned yesterday, Honey was just not herself so I decided to take her to the vet. Hubby agreed, but, lets face it, he was at work 45 or more minutes away and I was going to get the job of taking her. I began the preparation for this adventure by having Eldest Daughter brush the heck out of Honey the night before, hoping to have less dog hair in my car. Yesterday, right before the appointment, I spread a twin size sheet all over the passenger side of the car, floor, seat, and console. Then it was off we go, just Honey and I!

I knew that Honey wasn’t feeling her usual self just because she wasn’t a handful and a half on the way there, she was only a handful. unfortunately, the vet office was busy (I guess) as the appointment was at 3:45 and I didn’t see a doctor until 4:20. I didn’t get to leave until 5:10. Felt like I was at a human doctor’s office. I am happy to report that the doctor didn’t feel any masses in Honey’s abdomen but when she manipulated poor Honey’s back Honey’s lips curled up in that “If I hadn’t evolved over thousands of years to love humans and put up with their crap, I would so totally be ripping your face off right now” look. Since it was my face that was within ripping distance of those teeth I was glad she restrained herself.

So the diagnosis is that Honey has strained her lower back and needs to take it easy for two weeks as well as take an anti inflammatory. Unfortunately, the x-ray machine was on the blink so guess who gets to take another ride with Honey tomorrow? Yep, I left the sheet in my car. No point in taking it out quite yet!   Besides, it makes the Camry look so classy!

After my big whine about summer yesterday I thought it only fair that I mention the good things about summer here in Inland So Cal.

1. Little or no humidity. “It’s a dry heat” as we like to say.

2. The beach. Yes, it is an hour away, but that is close enough to go whenever we want. The water visits us from Alaska so it is chilly, which feels nice on a hot day.

3. Inviting people over for a cold icy drink and a dip in the pool.

4. Growing veggies in our garden, even if that garden is just one zucchini plant! The long growing season means lots of time to harvest the fresh veggies!

5. The heat is a good reason to not do anything!

6. Flip flops and sandals allow me to show off the cute paint job on my toes.

7. The smell of certain brands of sunscreen scream “summer” to my senses and brings back all kind of good memories.

8. Icees, Slurpies, or what every ice infused beverage you enjoy, takes on a new delight in the heat of the summer.

9.  If the idea of sand in our pants isn’t appealing, we can go to the mountains instead to cool off.

10. There is something to be said for experiencing summer in a place where summer is the iconic season. When people think of Southern California, they think of summer, not winter, spring, or fall, although those are nice too.

FYI: Honey the dog has to go to the vet today. Something seems a little off and she seems to be experiencing some discomfort. Please send good karma her way. She is almost 12!

This past weekend definitely gave us a preview of summer. Sunday in particular was quite warm, topping out in the high 90s. We were jumping into hot cars and cries of “Roll down the windows” echoed though the neighborhood. My lone zucchini plant slurped up water like a sailor on shore leave slurps up beer. The air conditioner happily ran while draining pennies, nickels, and dimes from my pocket-book. I have to admit it, I don’t love summer. Maybe if it snowed here in the winter I would appreciate summer more. But it doesn’t and I don’t. Here are my top ten reasons why summer in inland Southern California is not my thing:

1. Return of the mosquitos. Left alone, there wouldn’t be many mosquitos in the area but add a pond on a golf course to the mix and Voila! The little blood suckers harass us at night and I don’t appreciate it. I need to add “Call mosquito abatement” to my list of things to do.

2. Sweat – I don’t like to sweat, period. Menopause has not helped this little problem, either.

3. I really don’t like hopping into a car that has been sitting in the sun on a hot day. They are ovens! It causes more sweat, see number 2 above.

4. The previous owners of our house had a thing for invasive plants. The planted them about the house with abandon. In the front of the house summer means fighting the morning glories off. If we don’t attack them on a regular basis they will take over and smother everything else in the front yard. Hubby was already out Saturday beginning the summer offensive.

5. I am a white person in the most basic sence – my skin is very white. Some people find this offensive in the glaring brightness of a summer sun. So showing it off it not my favorite thing to do.

6. Sunscreen, slathering on sunscreen. See number 5 above.

7. Turn your eyes and attention away for a moment and Boom! the pool turns green. Nothing says summer like a swamp in your back yard!

8. Summer starts in May around here and lasts until mid October. Sigh….

9. The heat.

10. The heat. Yes, I just repeated it, because we do get heat around here, living in a desert and all.

OK, I have whined enough! Tomorrow I will tell you what is delightful and amazing about Southern California summers!

The Social Security Administration released the list of top 10 most popular names for boys and girls in 2011 last week. I soon received an email from Hubby concerning the new list. His reaction was “Really?!?”  Needless to say this drove me to take a look at what Americans are naming their children nowadays. I just have a few comments.

1. We seem to have an obsession with Italy, as least when it comes to naming girls, thus the top ten names Sophia,  Isabella, and Mia.

2. Being at war for what seems like decades in the middle east has not affected the popularity of the Persian name Ava, especially since Reese Witherspoon named her daughter Ava.

3. The name Jayden (or Jaden) wasn’t even on the radar before 1994 when it first cracked the top 1000. Then in 1998 Will Smith and his wife named their son Jaden and off it went!

4. The nerd-tastic name Mason was 39th in 2006 and now it is number 2. The jump in popularity is attributed to Kourtney Kardashian naming her son Mason.

5. While names of Italian origin might be popular for girls, names of Biblical origin still win out for boys with top ten names Michael, Noah, Jacob,  and Daniel. Who am I kidding? Jacob is popular right now because of the Twilight books. But it is still biblical and that sounds a lot better than “My mom named me after a character in a teen vampire book.”

6. When it comes to naming our children, too many of us are incredibly shallow and will name our precious darling after some celebrity’s kid at the drop of a hat.

The top ten names for 2011 are below:

For boys:

• Jacob
• Mason
• William
• Jayden
• Noah
• Michael
• Ethan
• Alexander
• Aiden
• Daniel

For girls:

• Sophia
• Isabella
• Emma
• Olivia
• Ava
• Emily
• Abigail
• Madison
• Mia
• Chloe

Oh so many years ago, (although in some ways it seems like yesterday) the day after Hubby and I returned from our honeymoon we discovered that my mother had taken ill while we were gone. That began a difficult time of surgery, rehabilitation, and the complete switching of the mother/daughter roles. My Dad had passed away a few years before and I was the main one who had to deal with taking care of Mom, with me just married and all of 24 years old. Family friends expressed worry that the stress of this situation would ruin my brand new marriage. I just muttered to myself “I hope I picked better than THAT.”

Fast forward to last year when Hubby and I were planning to celebrate or 25th wedding anniversary. My brother had had major surgery at the beginning of April and had just gotten out of a month’s stay in the hospital and then skilled nursing when he called with the list of follow-up doctor’s appointments. His first visit to the oncologist was scheduled smack dab in the middle of the day on our anniversary, a day we were planning on taking off work and spending with each other.  Without thinking I made some mention of that to my brother and he immediately said he would change the appointment. I came to my senses at that point and told him no way, Hubby and I would be there at the appointed time to pick him up and go with him to that appointment. I certainly would not want to delay MY first appointment to see a cancer doctor and I wasn’t going to do that to Bro.

I felt a little bad, though, when I had to tell Hubby that our planned anniversary day out would now include a visit to the oncologist. However, he assured me it was no problem and we planned our day around the appointment.

On our anniversary we spent the morning in Pasadena, looking around at shops and perusing a bookstore. We had a nice leisurely lunch and then picked up Bro for his appointment. After the appointment we dropped him back off and then went to Huntington Beach where we walked on the pier and had dinner at a fun open air Mexican restaurant. It was one of the most perfect days of my entire life.

Marriage is all about going through all life brings together and our 25th anniversary epitomized that commitment. My Hubby’s gracious understanding concerning Bro’s appointment, being there together to support Bro, and still having day of doing some of our favorite things together made it a memorable day. Yep, I picked good.

I did a little grocery shopping last night. It was at a store I don’t go to that much which also happens to be much bigger than the store I usually shop at. So I wandered around quite a bit trying to find the things I was looking for. Somehow I ended up on the toy aisle. Bigger store meant a bigger selection of toys. A doll in the ubiquitous pink package caught my eye. Yep, it was Barbie. But there was something a little different about her so I went in for a closer look.

There was Barbie the ballerina. However, unlike the Barbies that lived in my house back in the day the only piece of clothing that was removable was her tutu. Her little toe shoes, her pink tights and her flower bedecked bodice were all a permanent part of this Barbie. It was then I realized that Mattel had misnamed her. If they had given her the correct name mothers of daughters all over America would be snapping her up. She should have been called “Never Naked Barbie.”

Oh yes, all you mothers of daughters remember those days. No sooner had you managed to pull tiny little sleeves over those stick arms and pointy fingers, maneuver slippery pink material over those pointed breasts, pull a skirt or shorts around that tiny butt, your darling daughter would rip them right back off again, leaving the naked perfection that is Barbie to taunt you, or at least to injure you when you “accidentally” stepped on her.

To be a mother of a person possessing XX chromosomes in America is to live with naked Barbies. It is kind of embarrassing at first. having Barbie and her lush nakedness scattered about your house. You try to cover her up and get some clothes on that hussy. But soon it becomes too much. Little girls always leave her and her perky breasts naked in the most public room in the house and we learn to live with it.

So, I am telling you Mattel, “Never Naked Barbie” would be a perennial bestseller.

Grandma: “Sally says she wants a Barbie for her birthday. What kind does she want?”

Mom: “I don’t care what she wants. Get her that Never Naked Barbie. I am tired of trying to keep the Barbies she already has dressed.”

Seriously, I should be paid for amazing ideas like this!